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Houston Texans proving they’re still elite at losing with latest blowout in Miami

From David Culley to Lovie Smith, and Davis Mills to Kyle Allen, it doesn’t matter what the Houston Texans try. They still suck.

While no one expected the Texans to be any good this season, they’re once again proving to be one of the NFL’s very best — when it comes to losing.

In this case, the Texans made a starting quarterback change this week, going from Mills, who ‘led’ the team to a 1-8-1 record in the team’s first 10 games, to Allen, who’s made 17 starts in his five-year NFL career.

And the results? Arguably much, much worse. As in their worst performance of the season.

The Texans found themselves trailing 30-0 at halftime, with Dolphins QB Tua Tagovailoa putting up a stat line that resembles a full four quarters.

  • Tua Tagovailoa stats vs Houston in first half: 20-of-34, 278 yards, 1 TD, 1 sack
  • Kyle Allen stats vs Miami in first half: 10-of-16, 49 yards, 1 INT, 3 sacks

Clearly, Mills was far from the problem.

In fact, he may be closer to the solution than we previously thought, at least in comparison to Allen’s performance. No wonder why six-time 1,000-yard receiver Brandin Cooks was begging to get traded ahead of the deadline. This team is horrible.

We saw the latest example of that in Miami on Sunday, where they are getting beaten to a pulp against the Dolphins.

There is no hope for Houston this season, but there’s always looking forward to April’s draft process for something to get excited about.

Related: 2023 NFL mock draft: Houston Texans land Bryce Young, 3 QBs land in Round 1

Houston Texans have been tanking for years

NFL: Houston Texans at Miami Dolphins

The Texans are a mess in 2022, but this is nothing new. Why do you think Deshaun Watson didn’t even want to play for this woeful organization a season ago?

Even with Watson, the Texans fielded an embarrassing roster that ended 4-12 in 2019, and they’ve somehow remained terrible ever since. But there are plenty of reasons why.

After not having a first-round pick in either 2020 or 2021, the roster not only lacked talent, but they also lacked potential.

It didn’t help that the Texans also didn’t have a second-round pick in 2021 and botched their 2020 selection by picking Ross Blacklock, who’s no longer with the team after failing to live up to his draft standing.

While the Texans finally got some reinforcements via the draft in 2022 by selecting Derek Stingley Jr. and Kenyon Green in the first round, we can’t expect a bunch of rookies to drastically turn around an organization that is far from being close to winning.

It also hasn’t helped that the organization has seemingly treated the head coach hiring process like a joke in recent past. It started with giving Bill O’Brien full roster control, in addition to his coaching duties, but it continued by hiring an unqualified David Culley, only to fire him a season later. In all honesty, the guy probably never had a chance.

Then they doubled down by hiring Lovie Smith, who certainly has a lot more experience, coming in having been a head coach for 176 NFL games prior to joining Houston, but there were still far more qualified candidates.

Don’t even get me started on their deep admiration for potentially hiring Josh McCown, who also has no head coaching experience, reminding us of the Jeff Saturday situation in Indianapolis.

Houston hasn’t been trying to win for a few years now, but they also haven’t exactly nailed their decisions either, going with Mills as the starter from day one, hiring incompetent leaders, and otherwise coasting until a superstar lands back in their laps, as it once did with Watson.

Either way, the current players on hand, trying to deal with this mess, aren’t happy. It shouldn’t surprise anyone if we see vets like Jerry Hughes, Brandin Cooks, and several others leaving Houston this offseason and never coming back.

Related: NFL Power Ranking: Eagles and Cowboys soar, Vikings and Jets crash

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