Paul Pierce: ‘Everybody knows’ the Earth is flat

By Michael Dixon

Boston Celtics’ star Kyrie Irving now knows that the Earth is not flat. But a past Celtics’ star, Paul Pierce, is not convinced.

Irving issued an apology¬†for his past “conspiracy theory.”

Pierce took great exception to Irving walking back his thinking.

“Why apologize when the Earth is flat? Everybody knows this. Everyone knows this. The Earth is flat. If I get on an airplane and I fly across the country and the Earth is spinning, it shouldn’t take me that long, right? It shouldn’t take me 12 hours to fly to China if the Earth is spinning. I should go straight up in the air and if the Earth is moving on its axis, I should just land in China in less than an hour.”

This is a new argument. We can at least credit Pierce for making his claim so passionately here. He’s not about to be swayed. Still, we’re guessing that Pierce didn’t major in any kind of science in his three years at Kansas.

Also, if you see Pierce walking slowly on the street, don’t just assume that it’s because of an old injury. If you were worried that one misstep could literally cause you to fall off the face of the earth, you’d be walking slowly, too.