Many people define the work “nerd” in different ways. Sometimes a quirky smile is nerdy, or wearing the typical horn-rimmed glasses portrays a nerd-like look. Other people classify certain hobbies or interests nerdish, or extremely well-educated people are often referred to as nerds.
Maybe a person just has a knack for making incredibly goofy faces, labeling them a nerd. Whatever the reason, the NFL is filled with a variety of nerds and here are names of some of the most prominent guys who stand out.
Without further ado, The NFL’s 10 Biggest Nerds.
NFL Book Smart Nerds: Is he the Biggest of NFL’s 10 Biggest Nerds?
Fitzpatrick, who was just cut by the Tennessee Titans, is an Apple technology nerd and is the first Harvard graduate to start as an NFL quarterback. He also possesses the highest score in the NFL on the Wonderlic test, which he completed in just nine minutes. Let’s just say his overwhelming intelligence is probably getting in the way of just plain old playing football.
When Fitzpatrick proceeds to pass, he’s probably scientifically analyzes the whole process like, “if I can create a curvature on the exact arch of this oval shaped element and throw with the centrifugal force of 50.04 degrees lateral, then the receiver, who’s running at precisely 8.234 miles per hour south, south west, can jump 2.329 feet in a 47.9 degree angular direction and catch the ball”. He has brains that will far outlast his brawn on the football field.
For this, Fitzpatrick tops our list of The NFL’s 10 Biggest Nerds
First of all, his name is Myron, which is usually the name of the nerdy kid who got hit with spit wads in school. Recently cut by the Pittsburgh Steelers, this defense back may now have the opportunity to put his Oxford University master’s degree in medical anthropology to work. Described as too slow in the NFL, don’t be surprised to see Rolle practicing a career as a neurosurgeon at a medical facility near you.
What wouldn’t be surprising either is if this nerdy doctor ended up operating on an NFL player, as we do know they suffer their fair share of head injuries. Let’s just hope those who called him slow never partake in the medical services of Rolle. This is when being one of the NFL’s 10 biggest nerds actually works out very well. Nerd power!
Twitter Voted NFL Nerds
ESPN’s John Clayton
Clayton is perhaps the biggest nerd NFL commentator of all time. He’s been with ESPN since 1995, and prior to joining ESPN, he was a beat writer for the Pittsburgh Press. He is well known in the NFL industry by millions. The words “Cryptkeeper and eggheaded” are synonymous with Clayton.
“He hosted the show with former NFL quarterback Sean Salisbury; the show included “Four Downs,” a debate with Salisbury over current NFL issues.
Their debates often became quite heated, with Salisbury referring to Clayton as the “Cryptkeeper” and “Mr. Peabody”, mocking his geeky and “eggheaded” appearance and voice, and Clayton responding by calling Salisbury “Mr. Backup” based on his limited playing time during his NFL career.”
The “Cryptkeeper/Nerd” is also a diehard heavy metal fan, as depicted above within the tweet.
The baby-faced, lead quarterback for the Detroit Lions was voted a nerdy NFL player by:
@liveocgirl matthew stafford
— Lion Lenny (@LionLenny) March 19, 2014
Unlike the book smart nerds mentioned above, Stafford’s nerdy personality and awkward smile earned him the privilege of a mention within this article.
Even with Stafford’s boyishly-nerdy looks, he still managed to capture a hot girlfriend in Kelly Hall. Sometimes the nerd scores the pretty girl and the girl ends up being with one of the NFL’s 10 biggest nerds.
— The Fantasy Junkie™ (@FantasyJunkie24) March 19, 2014
Outside linebacker for the Denver broncos, Miller was also voted a nerd by NFL Twitter.
Known for sporting those gawky, oversized nerd glasses, how can you not call Miller a nerd? Perhaps Miller wears the glasses as a cover for his trouble-making, dark side.
At the beginning of the 2013 NFL season, Miller served a six-game suspension for violating the NFL’s substance abuse policy. Prior to his NFL career, Miller was suspended for the entire spring of his freshman year at Texas A&M for skipping too many classes.
Hopefully repetitive wear of the nerdy glasses will brainwash Miller into being a law-abiding citizen during the offseason so he can play in the Denver Broncos 2014 season opener.
The Artsy NFL Nerd
San Francisco 49ers tight end, Davis is a machine on the field, but who knew he had a nerdy, artsy side?
Davis is the founder of an interior design company, “Modern Class Design” and he also started “Gallary 85” which is a showcase gallery where new artists can display their upcoming works of art. You’ll also find Davis’ own original, beautiful paintings in his gallery too.
Here’s a look at Davis upon the opening of his art gallary. I’ll bet some women out there are having a new appreciation for Davis rather than thinking of him as your typical NFL jocky hunk, he’s got a compassionate nerdy creative side.
The Comic Book NFL Nerd
For all you lovers of comic books, myself excluded, Briggs of the Chicago Bears is a huge linebacker and huge collector of comic books and even writes his own comics. This is about as nerdy as it gets for hobbies.
According to Comic Book Resources, Briggs states, “I’ve been in love with comics since I was 7 years old. I remember reading my first ever comic, the Original X-Men, and thinking that it was the coolest thing ever,” said Briggs. “Top Cow and C2E2 are making my childhood dreams come true.”
There you have it, some men just don’t completely grow up.
NFL Nerds By Default Of Facial Expressions
Manning is the goofy-faced nerd of a quarterback for the New York Giants in case you’ve been away from the planet for the last several years, and he just bleeds geek in so many ways through his facial expressions. Look above at this Manning montage of incredibly nerdy, and ridiculously goofy faces.
If you can’t classify how awkwardly nerdy Manning is now, then you’re just not seeing him how I do.
Being the ever-so dull quarterback of the Baltimore Ravens, Flacco has earned a mention in this article.
His dad was brutally honest as he told the New York Times how extremely dull and un-exciting Flacco is.
“Joe is dull,” Steve Flacco said in a telephone interview. “As dull as he is portrayed in the media, he’s that dull. He is dull.”
Dull pretty much equates to nerd in my book when you look as bored as Flacco does all of the time. Please tell me you do not disagree with this nerd/creeper photo:
Let’s shed that nerdy image, Flacco and get a personality for 2014.
We can’t forget to add Cutler to this NFL nerds list, right? I think Bears’ quarterback, Cutler is king of the nerdiest, goofiest faces ever. And his “don’t care” response to nearly everything that is addressed to him makes my ears bleed. Like Stafford, Cutler scored a hot wife in Kristin Cavallari. Maybe nerd is her thing, because with an expression like this, I’m not getting it.
This wraps up 10 diverse nerds in the NFL; ranging from awkward faces, to ultra-educated, to creative to just plain nerd. Who are some of your favorite NFL nerds?
Photo: Don McPeak, USA Today Sports